Orthnerisms: Chapter One

Yes the epic publication of the web novel Bradyisms did real come to a close, but its much anticipated sequel is being premiered today! Like Bradyisms this publication will be released in chapters… I hope you all enjoy the sequel as much as the first.

 

This change to all Orthners is necessary due to the fact we have now two little girls that can have full conversations.

 

Bradyisms:

 

• “Mommy, when I am grown up, can I go grocery shopping by myself and cook chicken just like you?”
• “ After I am four, I will be five!” Yes, sweetheart “What will I be after I am five?” Six “oh, then I can smush?” Smush, what are you talking about? I look back and she has her cheeks blown up and ‘swishing’ them back and forth.
• Me: Do you want to sign up to learn how to play baseball like daddy? “YES!!! Then I can do cheerleading there too?”
• I have to add a story to this…When I was pregnant with Brady, Karl and I were talking about what activities we envisioned our baby girl doing one day. I stated I hoped she didn’t dance because of the body image issues I had as a teenager. He said well we will sign her up for soccer! I said she may not want to do soccer, his response, well she will have to try for at least one season. I said there was no way you could have gotten me on a soccer field when I was a kid.
• So when Brady said this cheerleading thing to me, I brought that conversation up to Karl. He now realizes his first born will most likely not be playing soccer, at least in the near future! He is of course okay with that.
• We were driving around in the car as a whole family and Brady started saying “palandges” over and over cracking up. I said “what are you saying?” Her response “toesies “ Then I realized that she was saying a word that sounded vaguely familiar from my grade school days “phalanges” I immediately pulled out my iPhone to figure out what it meant, since Karl and I had no clue. And sure enough, after I figured out how to spell it, it means the bones in the foot!

Of course, I had one to write for Reese and I can’t think of it now. I will post more when I think of them (or hear new isms that crack me up)